Caroling, caroling

It's about that time of year and I thought I would share an updated carol. Enjoy!

Ode to Stella Artois (sung to Winter Wonderland)

Cell phones ring, are you listening,
At the bar, chicks are drinking
A beautiful sight,
We're happy tonight.
Chugging lots of Stella Artois pints.

Gone away are the blue balls,
Here to stay is the new call
He signals a play,
We enter the fray,
Chugging lots of Stella Artois pints.

In the alley we can draft a wingman,
and pretend that he is Jackson Browne

He'll say: Are you ready?
We'll say: No man.
But can you get me in
when you're in there?

Later on, we'll conspire,
As we dream by the fire
To face unafraid,
The plans that we've made,
Chugging lots of Stella Artois pints.

At the table, we can have some Stellas,
And pretend that we’re too cool for school
We'll have lots of fun with sloppy drunk chicks,
Until one cock blocks you and knocks you down.

At last call, ain't it thrillin',
Though your nose is a bleedin’
We'll order a round, the ex-wingman’s way,
Chugging lots of Stella Artois pints.

Punchlines

Everyone here should learn something from what has happened here today. Except Jenkins of course because he...

...was in the bathroom, learning what not to eat at lunch.