Favorite Christmas Movies

In no particular order, I wanted to put together a list of Christmas themed movies that I've enjoyed through the years.

It's A Wonderful Life

Truly a classic fantasy story where George lives his entire life not knowing what sort of impact he has made on all the people around him and in his darkest hour, Clarence reveals how a dystopian life without George could be and through that experience, he realizes he desperately wants his own life back.

Love Actually

A medley of love stories leading up to Christmas, from unrequited love as is the case in this clip, first loves and crushes, infidelity, and so on. This is a wonderful movie about love around the holidays.

The Holiday

Two women swap houses for a couple weeks at Christmas and discover love in these new temporary worlds they inhabit. For Amanda who meets and falls in love with Iris' brother Graham, she finally opens up her heart.

The Family Man

Another fantasy story where Jack Campbell who has lived a jet-setting life of M&A is so full of himself that he taunts fate and is transported to a suburban life complete with wife and two kids. A fish out of water for most of the movie, he eventually settles in and realizes what he's been missing.

The Year Without Santa Claus

This one just takes me back my childhood. Loved this one growing up!

A Charlie Brown Christmas

An oldie but a goodie.

Bridget Jones Diary

This lovely romantic comedy takes place over the course of a year, but Christmas seems to bookend the opening and closing sequence which is quite touching, as you see Bridget's progression.

The Sound of Music

I remember sitting at the kitchen table in our flat in Toronto watching this beautiful musical on a small television angled at us on the counter and I was entranced.

Rent

Modern-day adaptation of La Boheme with one of the most stunning and memorable soundtrack, including Seasons of Love.

White Christmas

And what list would be complete without Bing Crosby's White Christmas.

Punchlines

I couldn't possibly wear something smaller, possibly a napkin, but do you think it's really necessary for me to cover my three nipples?

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

How happy is the blameless Vestal's lot!
The world forgetting, by the world forgot.
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!
Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd.
- Alexander Pope

A close friend introduced me to this amazing film about memories, longing and fate. It's an intriguing story told in a fractured narrative about erasing painful memories and exploring the implications of that sort of possibility. As much sorrow that could be had by living through pain, I'm not sure that I would opt for it and this is why: I think suffering yields growth and art... maybe even a connection to humanity, and I'm not sure if I would want to eradicate that part of me. The human experience would be far less meaningful, I would think.

There are a few moments that I particularly enjoyed in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. The first is  when the two of them escape to his childhood memory framed by the beautiful scoring of Jon Brion.



The second is the moment when Joel realizes that he doesn't want to give up the happy memories along with the sad ones. Creating these memories are fleeting enough and I think one of life's gifts is that through time, you do look back fondly at the happy moments in your life and push away the dark ones.



And I love what Ebert had written in his review, "Discovering this, Joel in revenge applies to have his memories of her erased. But the funny thing about love is, it can survive the circumstances of its ending; we remember good times better than bad ones, and Joel decides in mid-process that maybe he would like to remember Clementine after all. He tries to squirrel away some of his memories in hidden corners of his mind, but the process is implacable."


Punchlines
Do midgets belong in porn?
Oh pish. Come on, don't be such a prude. We all need a little fun.

My Dinner with Andre

On a quiet, rainy sunday night, I watched for the first time the brilliant movie, My Dinner with Andre. Over the course of a two hour meal, these two masterful storytellers recount their experiences and talk of the theatre, life, art, and what it means to live. Watching this is like eavesdropping on the conversation at the next table in a posh restaurant, and one can easily imagine the stories as they're told rather than watch a series of flashback sequences. This of course goes counter to a typical cinematic experience and especially the mantra in screenwriting to "show, don't tell." But even so, this movie works for me probably because I have a pretty active imagination and could easily visualize this film in my mind's eye.  And after hearing the line "I could also live in my art but never in my life," I was hooked. I could sympathize with that sentiment from a writers' and artists' perspective, but  it is a devastating and tragic way to live, no?

There were many other ideas explored through dialog that I found intriguing and I was struck with how timely my viewing of this movie occurred in light of my last blog entry.

What does it mean to be alive, truly alive?

"Most people I met thought there was something wrong with me. They didn’t say that, but I could tell that that was what they thought. But see, what I think I experienced was for the first time in my life, to know what it means to be truly alive. Now that’s very frightening because with that comes an immediate awareness of death because they go hand in hand. The kind of impulse that Walt Whitman in Leaves of Grass, that feeling of being connected to everything, it means to also be connected to death. And that’s pretty scary, but I really felt as if I were floating above the ground, not walking…"

Andre's central thesis is that the modern age is stripping us of our humanity.

“You see, I think it's quite possible that the nineteen-sixties represented the last burst of the human being before he was extinguished. And that this is the beginning of the rest of the future now, and that from now on there'll simply be all these robots walking around, feeling nothing, thinking nothing.”

We aren't acting like true and honest people instead we're take up roles which are related to our occupations. We conform ourselves to narrow pursuits and expectations instead acting out of our own genuine desires.

“I've acted the role of the husband, I've acted the role of the friend, I've acted the role of the writer, director, what have you. I've lived in the same room with this person but I haven't really seen them. I haven't really heard them. I haven't really been with them.”

We are so dissconnected from other people that we know very little about the lives of our closest friends.

“I mean, we live in such ludicrous ignorance of each other. I mean, we usually don't know the things we'd like to know even about our supposedly closest friends!”

In a way, I envisioned myself in Wally's character who having spent that fictitious evening with his friend Andre, summed up his thoughts about his own way of looking at life. He didn't need Mount Everest to have this life-affirming realization.

"Tell me, why do we require a trip to Mount Everest in order to be able to perceive one moment of reality? I mean...I mean, is Mount Everest more "real" than New York? I mean, isn't New York "real"? I mean, you see, I think if you could become fully aware of what existed in the cigar store next door to this restaurant, I think it would just blow your brains out! I mean...I mean, isn't there just as much "reality" to be perceived in the cigar store as there is on Mount Everest?"

Wally lives a simple life and can find joy in the simple things. Isn't it enough to feel more alive in those moments without having to resort to bold gestures? I'd like to think so.

Punchlines

I too love cats. I love 'em. I play with 'em. I touch 'em. I...
Judge: Thank you, that will do. The defendant may be seated.

Abre los ojos

First of all, to those who follow me on twitter, sorry for that half-baked comment that I made. For those who missed it, this is what I wrote:

TGeorgeSand Feel like phasing out the mundane from my life. Is that possible?

...followed by...

TGeorgeSand BTW my "mundane phase out" plan has nothing to do with unfollowing or defriending. I may have to blog about what I meant (or just shut up).

So this is what I meant. I'll just ramble a bit about it and if it happens to gel with you, great. If not, then move along. There's really nothing to see here except an addle-minded ingénue (yeah, right).

Over the past several months, I've been fascinated by this notion of waking up. Not the kind of waking up you do every morning, but the kind of waking up that occurs when your senses feel enlivened or heightened as a child would respond when he first discovers the world or more importantly what happens when this occurs within your mind, heart or soul in a way that can alter the way that you look at life.

So rather than see a routine - for example, commuting to work - as mundane, it's becoming aware of the sensations of what it is to do such a thing. It could also be about listening to a friend, not in the half-assed way where you really want to turn the conversation around back to yourself, but in a way that fully engages your attention on her. It could be about approaching life in a fresh way and looking for elements that resonate with you or to find beauty in the ordinary.

Certainly there's the clinical aspect to this and according to the Mayo Clinic, keeping your mind sharp by doing different things prevents mental atrophy. But I suppose what I'm focused on is what will feed your soul.

Wouldn't that just make life a little more bearable? But not just that, wouldn't it make it chimerical? So to bring the comment full circle, what I meant about "phasing out the mundane," was really a call-to-action on my part to view life through a different lens and not always allow the automatic thoughts to take over or to zombie through life. This could mean exploring new places locally or abroad, meeting new people from different walks of life, sampling different cuisines from around the world, trying something new ... but in the end, whatever it is, it's about waking up and abre los ojos.


Punchlines
Well, my date was going just fine until she started Frenching her Yorkie. Now I guess I'll just have to play with my Puli.

All In

I guess you could say that I embarked on this year's NaNoWriMo with an unspoken challenge to myself. It was a notion spawned by an essay written by Benjamin Percy and in it he described writers as conservative, sparing in how they dole out ideas to certain projects, always keeping a stockpile under lock and key, saved for other projects should the time warrant.

I've never been the type of writer who has a such a stockpile, but I've also never tried putting every drop of myself and all of my best material into a story. But with this novel, I thought why not? Thirty days of writing with abandon is just the start to this and writing the first 82,000 words now has left me feeling emptied and that it would take me at least another thirty days to recover. And that's what the past five days of November have felt like, wondering whether or not I could pick this project up again when I haven't even finished it.

But then a glimmer of inspiration came to me yesterday, which indicated to me that my well of ideas have yet to be depleted, that although I felt like I had gone "all in", I still have more to give, and that maybe this is just a brief reprieve before I continue with this project at a more rational pace. So even though the month ended with a bit of a whimper, I am celebrating the process of creating.

And for the wrap-up of the final days of November:

Nov 26-27: I swear after that big push to 80K, I didn't have anything left in me. Took Friday off and even today I don't feel like there's that much fuel left. I may change my mind later tonight, but so far only logged in 1500 words. (81,777 words)

Nov 28: Another Eureka-in-the-bathtub moment… although I doubt I can pull it off, I'm pretty excited to try a little Moliere in Chapter 30, which was feeling rather stale until now. (81,829 words)

Nov 29: Deleted about 2K words and rewrote it so not making the word count progress I hoped, but I'm certainly feeling much better about several weak spots that were troubling me. Still haven't rewritten Chapter 30 because I need to take a detour and read a little Moliere first. (82,009 words)

Nov 30: Without 175,000 writers to draft along side, I'll need to set my own goals so in order to get through the rest of the novel, I'm going to commit to writing at least 1,000 words each day. It's just four new pages but will also give me time to edit as well.

Punchlines
I never knew playing darts was such a dangerous thing.
A hard pointy thing... that you use to score? Oh yeah. Danger.

Bari Improv

I love this moment in the movie when August Rush discovers music for the first time. He plucks the string of a borrowed guitar and what issues forth is magical. Watching him in this scene is like watching someone wake up from the inside.



The song Bari Improv is actually performed by guitarist Kaki King, whose hands are also filmed in this sequence.

How many times have you watched a movie, read a book, heard a song or if you're blessed with the talent  that you've created a thing and thereby experienced a connection to whatever is out there? I was watching Dead Poets Society last night and was reminded by the quote from John Keating, "We don't read and write poetry because it's cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion. And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for."

As if it warranted any further explanation, this is why I write.

Punchlines
I am highly strung. I suspect it’s all because of the hand cannon shoved down my mouth.

Gobble, gobble

Well, I did it and just in time for turkey! Although I achieved my word count goal for NaNoWriMo for the month of November, it turns out I am far from done with the first draft. I have roughly fifteen more chapters to write which at the rate I'm going will yield a manuscript of roughly 115,000 words. I didn't think I had that many words in me, but I guess I did.

Anyway, I'm taking a break to serve food to the homeless downtown and then this afternoon, I'll prepare Thanksgiving dinner for the family at home. I am thankful for so much this year, that for once, I'm at a loss for words to share here. Much love and happiness to everyone during the holidays!

As soon as I captured this moment, I already changed the target goal to 100,000 which I hope to achieve by November 30th. It's always good to keep raising the bar, isn't it?

Here's the daily chronicle over the past few days:

Nov 22: Part of me is really wondering who's in charge: me or the muse? (70,010 words)

Nov 23: Grinded through another day. Feeling somewhat stale and spent. The A-story feels like it is heading to its natural conclusion but it's happening six chapters too soon. I need to prolong the conflict/debate a little longer. Maybe I'll spend more time on the B-story over the next few days. (73,616 words)

Nov 24: Still working on the A-story and finished up Chapter 29 which I'm pretty happy about and starting Chapter 30. (78,050 words)

Nov 25: Took a breather at the 80,000 mark to get ready to serve food to the homeless and later I'll be preparing Thanksgiving dinner at home for the fam. Have a happy turkey day everyone!!! (80,080 words)

Punchlines

In the midnight hour babe she cried more, more, more!

Well, that's all well and good. But if you've been drinking, and it's late, do not listen to anyone who encourages you to trim your pubes.

I heart DFW

During my slump last week, I spent a little time trying to get a little more grounded in the face of the doubting voices in my head that really called into question what I was trying to accomplish with this piece. And then I found this little gem which set me straight.

"I realized that the point of being post-modern or being avant garde wasn’t following a certain kind of tradition, that all that stuff is BS imposed by critics who can’t follow it afterwards, but what great artists do, and it sounds really trite to say that line. What the really great artists do is that they are entirely themselves. They’ve got their own vision, their own way of fracturing reality and if it’s authentic and true, you’ll feel it in your nerve endings." ~ David Foster Wallace

Charlie Rose interviews David Foster Wallace

The words didn't exactly pour forth easily from then on, but it did flow with purpose and I've eeked out another 15,000 words since. Here's a chronicle of the journey for the past few days:

Nov 18: Even though I wrote a couple pages this morning, I plan to take the rest of the day off to recharge so that I can tackle a full day of writing tomorrow. (56,370 words)

Nov 19: A change of scenery helped a little today. I went to Café Amandine and parked myself there for a couple hours despite having only had less than four hours of sleep. Powered through Chapter 23 after skipping over Chapters 21 and 22… Not sure if I like them very much and will have to think about that particular subplot later when my mind is fresh. (59,050 words)

Nov 20: Once again skipped over a tricky subplot comprising Chapter 24 to focus on the A-story and fleshed out Chapter 25. This is one of those days where I feel like the novel is becoming quite a pastiche of incongruous ideas. (62,415 words)

Nov 21: Chapter 25 is turning into an interesting metafictional piece that may draw too much attention to itself. Hopefully I can keep most of this and not be forced back into conventional storytelling with this one. (65,010 words)

Punchlines

Twelve inches ago, I could have helped you. Twelve inches ago, something could be done, but now I'm afraid it's too late.

Sometimes, it's more than a foot that can come between two people.

Mash-ups

I'll have to thank my friend Shannon for getting me on the Glee bandwagon. They've actually done a phenomenal job introducing the world to mash-ups, something that I had discovered a couple years ago when my friend Pete who's a disc jockey gave me a copy of his mash-ups. It's the musical equivalent of being able to have fries and onion rings. This mash-up brings Singin' in the Rain together with Umbrella.

From a literary perspective, I've used the mash-up equivalent a lot in my own writing. Luscious Dumplings was a parody of the final court room drama in A Few Good Men but twisted up because I cast a celebrity chef in place of Colonel Jessup. Mash-ups are just the perfect amount of surprise and comic delight that comes from writing punch lines and sometimes it's the collision of disparate ideas that really can create some imaginative material.

Speaking of which, here's the latest daily update on my NaNoWriMo progress:

Nov 15: 5K sprints for three days in a row is a little nutty. Chapter 17 is shaping up nicely and I'm a little anxious to get to the midpoint when the story really starts to take off. (50,110 words)

Nov 16: What an emotional let down after that push to 50K. I need to stay focused on pushing along at least 3K per day for the rest of the month. Also need to find some other writers I can draft along side so I don't lose the competitive edge. Chapter 18 and 19 need a little more girth, too. (52,925 words)

Nov 17: My early morning writing produced probably the most enjoyable 750 words since the beginning of this manuscript. It's the last 750 words of Chapter 19. I'm torn between wanting to go back to the first chapter and begin rewriting with this same voice and to keep it consistent versus pushing forward with the second half, complete that, and then go back to the beginning. Even if I don't reach 80K, by the end of the month, I think I'll be better off crafting the story that doesn't make me cringe. If I produce no more than 750 words each day similar to this then I'd be a proud writer. (55,070 words)

Punchlines

Dear Abby, Lately I've been craving a glimpse of daylight. Just a brief moment once every couple of years. Is that too much to ask?

Yes. Next?

Uluru Redux

Ah, here we are in Uluru again. For those who haven't sojourned through this treacherous wasteland in the middle of Australia, I must caution you. It is not for the feint of heart. Make sure to pack supplies including a map, compass and two tons of caffeine. Well, maybe something lighter than that. It is after all 1,752 miles from Sydney. Since I am in Uluru once again, this could mean only one thing. That I am deep, deep, deep in the middle of novelling this month. So how is it going?

Well, true to my Type A nature, I've been keeping track of a variety of statistics along this journey called NaNoWriMo. Friends could hardly expect less from me, so I wouldn't want to disappoint them. For those visually inclined, I have a dashboard that updates all of the relevant stats on a daily and project basis.

Exhibit 1.

This tracks my overall progress toward achieving 80,000 words, where I am today, how many words on average I've written per day or per hour as well as how much far I have left to go. The good news is that at my current rate, I am tracking towards completing 80,000 words in time for Thanksgiving! Gobble, gobble.

Exhibit 2.

This second chart shows the slow and steady march toward 80,000 words along with my mood swings. After a couple of off days from the 10th through the 12th which I describe below, it feels like I'm back in the swing of things.

Nov 11: I need to go back to the basics with the inherent conflict and motivations of each character, especially the hero's. (32,018 words)

Nov 12: More of the same. Just feels like I'm going through the motions and I'm hoping tomorrow - without the pressure of having to reach word count minimums - that I can rework passages with more heart. (35,300 words)

Nov 13: hahaha - I rocked the wordcount today and really constructed some great scenes. Still leaving some juice for tomorrow and hope for another monster day. (40,090 words)

Nov 14: Really excited about how Chapter 15 and 16 are coming along and it feels like I've hit the equivalent of a runner's high. At the same time, I can't believe I have 8K words left before I reach the midpoint of the story. Yikes. (45,090 words)

Punchlines

Remember: A frown is just a smile upside down, always split pairs, and I before E except after C.

Dreamy

OMG what a fantastic performance of Teenage Dream this week! Such a breath of fresh air. This one is going on heavy rotation until my ears bleed.

And for those following along, here are some quick updates including an excerpt available for a limited time on NaNoWriMo:

Nov 6: Had fun taking a novel-related detour researching both the history of television in America as well as the history of written languages. Completed writing about my portal to the fantasy world and ended it with a snowball fight. What could be better? (16,435 words)

Nov 7: Weaving subplots within the narrative is starting to get tricky, especially staying on track with the internal journey of the hero. There are too many interesting external dynamics playing out that it seems "louder" somehow. (20,180 words)

Nov 8: Hit a really boring transitional section today so the wordcount slowed. Will probably need to rewrite it to make it more meaningful to the hero. But all is not lost, I came up with a pretty cool device that's relevant, if not a bit sci-fi-ish. Hope to make that part stick. (23,025 words)

Nov 9: Eureka in the bathtub moment in Chapter 9 which was a lot of fun to write. Chapter 10/11 didn't have enough story based on the outline so I had to combine those two chapters and split up Chapter 2 which was too long anyway. (27,201 words)

Nov 10: The early Act 2 chapters are becoming a major problem for me. There's not enough conflict and so I struggle with accelerating reveals from later chapters into these early sections. Perhaps a complicating subplot is in order. It's going to be a low-output day unless I skip ahead and work on a different chapter. (29,227 words)

Punchlines

CORNER CHICKEN SUIT DANCER: So I've been doin this gig for a month now...It's pretty cool.

HARVARD BUSINESS SCHOOL DEAN: Congratulations. You're now qualified to run Goldman Sachs.

NaNoWriMo

It's that time of year again, when 179,o00 enthusiasts embark on a new writing adventure called NaNoWriMo. This year I was a little reticent in participating until a friend posed the question after signing up herself. I really had not given it that much thought at that point and with tepid agreement, I hedged and said that if I could come up with an idea then I would.

A few weeks later after reading a couple novels and getting back into the rhythm of writing prose with my experimental short story Charm of Ivanhoe, I returned to this question. After a bit of brainstorming, I decided to write an urban fantasy in the vein of The Eyre Affair meets Back to the Future.

Living with the Cosby's

When a young boy immigrates to the land of opportunity, he discovers that life in America is fraught with greater moral peril than his native village in India. With no one to turn to for help, he escapes to TV Land only to discover he is now trapped living with the Cosby’s.

Unlike last year, I spent a few weeks outlining the story beats and then fleshing out the chapter outlines. This pre-work resulted in about a 40-page outline compared to Seasons of Conflict's 3-page outline. I'll let you know thirty-days from now whether extensive preparation served me well or not. So far, the first week has been productive, largely because I committed to a 5K Day One dash to build a sufficient cushion. I achieved that goal just barely, but I'm glad that I did. I don't feel as anxious if I decide to take an evening off here and there to be a normal person.

Here are my daily thoughts on the first week:

Nov 1: Pacing of Chapter 1 and 2 seems to be loose. I'm letting language and atmosphere take over rather than be overly concerned about reaching plot turns within 400-500 words. (5,045 words)

Nov 2: Had a really slow start in the morning, spending too much time re-reading passages written on Day 1. Worried about too much exposition in Chapter 2. Chapter 2 feels like it can easily stretch into twice the length given so much material to cover. This is turning into a 120,000-word novel at the rate of 3,000 words per chapter. (7,202 words)

Nov 3: Did a little bit better in the morning, but not strong enough IMO. Made up for it at lunchtime and felt good enough tonight to sprint to 10K. Still feeling good about the storyline and solved my “moral peril” issue and decided against writing about a meth lab in favor of euthanasia which feels more organic to the story. (10,020 words)

Nov 4: Seriously feeling like Chapter 4 is a little light on story. It needs to be more complex but I think it struggles because the action is too rushed and urgent. And the euthanasia argument needs to be recast in a more dynamic way. Maybe have him argue with his Uncle instead of doing research. (12,500 words)

Nov 5: Resolved it by making it into a philosophical debate. Now I need more action, maybe a physical confrontation to serve as a metaphor to convey the internal struggle he is facing. (13,400 words)

Punchlines

You know, I'm getting real frickin' tired of this. I mean, one, maybe two times I can give it a pass. It's just annoying. Then I mean. However, I really can't let this go this time without saying something. So let this be your final warning...

No hand-to-hand combat before breakfast and absolutely no decapitations until the back nine. Comprende?

Charm of Ivanhoe

My latest short story is about a drifter who, when he discovers that his mother is dying, abandons the search for his neglectful father and hitchhikes home to square accounts. The theme and tone was inspired by this song.

"Something Pretty" by Patrick Park

Here I am, where I've been
I've walked a hundred miles in tobacco skin,
And my clothes are worn & gritty.
And I know ugliness,
Now show me something pretty.

I was a dumb punk kid with nothing to lose
And too much weight for walking shoes.
I could have died from being boring.
As for loneliness,
She greets me every morning.

At the most I'm a glare,
I'm the hopeless son who's hardly there.
I'm the open sign that's always busted.
I'm the friend you need, but can't be trusted.

At the most I'm a glare,
I'm the hopeless son who's hardly there.
I'm the open sign that's always busted.
I'm the friend you need, but can't be trusted.

Here I am, where I've been
I've walked a hundred miles in tobacco skin,
And my clothes are worn & gritty.
And I know ugliness,
Now show me something pretty.

At the most I'm a glare,
I'm the hopeless son who's hardly there.
I'm the open sign that's always busted.
I'm the friend you need, but can't be trusted.

At the most I'm a glare,
I'm the hopeless son who's hardly there.
I'm the open sign that's always busted.
I'm the friend you need, but can't be trusted.

Punchlines

Strange ingredients can be a pleasant surprise. I would therefore always encourage experimentation when vacationing abroad! Case in point...? Absolutely THE best dish I ever tasted happened to be coconut baby oil while I was stranded on an island for three years.

(murmur in background)

What do you mean they serve other food in Manhattan?!

Oktoberfest 2010

Ode to Stella Artois

By George Sand

May be sung to the tune of Sweet Disposition by Temper Trap

Never too drunk
Oktoberfest’s begun
Another round on Matt
of Stella Artois,
burgers and fries
on Friday night.
Poker til dawn
with Mickey and Mark
Ramzy and Ken
Maria and Paul
Palace and Ben.
Just stay there
‘Cause I'll be comin' over
While Michelle’s still young.
Then on Saturday
Grilling, cornholing all day
Won't stop til it's over
or until eight-thirty
whichever comes first.
The Social Network
that night with Jon,
Sheila and Nick
and after we drink
again, of course
a pint or two
of Stella Artois
We’ll have some laughs.
Just stay there
Cause I'll be comin' over
While Bailey’s still young
And then on Sunday
Won't stop til it's over
Won't stop to surrender
Oh, Stella Artois
We raise our glass
and drink to you
all weekend long (won't stop til it's over)
Oh, Stella Artois
We raise our glass
and drink to you
all weekend long (won't stop til it's over)
Oh, Stella Artois
We raise our glass
and drink to you
all weekend long (won't stop til it's over)
Oh, Stella Artois
We raise our glass
and drink to you
all weekend long (won't stop til it's over)

Punchlines

You know, divorce isn't the only option. Have you considered homicide?

Bowl-A-Palooza 4

Ode to Stella Artois

By George Sand

Sung to the tune of “Empire State of Mind” by Jay-z and Alicia Keys

Yeah, yeah I'ma up at Burbank
Now I'm down in Hollywood
Right next to the Orchid
And now at Celebrity
I've brought Stellas with me
And since I brought it here
I will drink it anywhere
Yeah pour me another beer

I used to drink on rooftops
All my Trigger Streeter stunnas (Hey yo!)
Right there off of Franklin
Brought me back to that night last year
When Palace took a drop
Or was it before
With two girls and a cup
What’s in store this year? Fo sho…

Hanging with Aaron,
Andrew, Alex,
Jon, Matt, Jared,
And Nick from San Francisco.
Me? I'm out and will miss
Maddox vs. Sheila.
Get it on video.
Will Sophie bring her mom with her?

Say what up to Mickey
Mark, Chris, and Vivi
Sitting poolside
Ken and Ben give Ted high-5s
What up with the others?
I won’t take no “Mebbe’s”
Tell by my attitude that I'm really drunk on...

STELLA!!!
Weekend of Bowl-A-Palooza
There's nothing you can’t do when you drink Stella.
Stella will make you feel brand new,
Stella will inspire you,
Let's hear it for Stella, Stella, Stella…

Punchlines

Dear Abby: The latest incident with my boss involved a huge fight over a thumb drive. I thought we should resolve it by thumb wrestling, but he was at a disadvantage physically. Do you have any other suggestions?

I think you should familiarize yourself with Human Resources and finger him.

When in Rome

When I saw the photos taken by my friend's little brother of their Christmas spent in Europe, I felt an obligation to share it. Just look at these... They are all simply works of art! 

All photos by Ernest Lee.

Punchlines

The FIVE worst things to say at a job interview:

5. Yes, I do believe in ghosts. Doesn't everyone?

4. When is the earliest possible date I could take a holiday?

3. It seems lately I've lost the will to live.

2. They couldn't pin anything on me and so they let me go.

1. "Face time" at my old job wasn't anything like I imagined it would be. How do you define it here?

Amazon First Round

The hopes of roughly 8,000 people will be dashed today when the Amazon.com Break-through Novel Award make their announcement. Only 2,000 entries will move to the second round based on 300-word pitches. The evaluation is not made on the manuscript itself, but on the strength of the pitch, the originality of the idea and the quality of the writing of the pitch.

Tension is building on the forums, as no one quite knows whether the announcement will be made via email or appear on the website itself. 

Many are holding vigil, clicking on the refresh button every few minutes. Others are patiently scheduling their visits every four hours. 

Still others are convinced this year email notifications will go out on this day. But if the past is any indication, that wait may last four or five days. 

While some are participating in a virtual party as they wait, others are sharing their coping plans; chocolate and Thai food seem to be in favor as well as excessive drinking. 

While waiting, I've been playing with word clouds (see above). I haven't quite decided on my plans for today other than lunch. Thai seems like a good idea.

Punchlines

Will you please sign my petition? I'm collecting signatures for...

...my priest. He wants to get reinstated but the parents weren't too pleased with his oral performance.

The boys were, however.

Courtesy Laugh

No wonder comedy on TV isn't funny. It's not meant to be, according to this segment on NPR with veteran TV writer and producer Rob Long.

Punchlines

Dear Abby: Everyone seems to be breathing down my neck to make a decision. It's a lot of pressure, and I know a bomb will explode if I make a mistake. Not a literal bomb, but a real one. So I need your help. Which wire do I cut?

Look lady... If you have the time to write a letter, stamp it, and take it to the mail box, and you think that I will receive it, answer it, and it somehow beats out all the other 47 letters that I receive each week... if you think that you will still have time for all that to happen and you read this article and whatever... and you STILL have time to weigh whether my advice is credible and discuss it with your coworkers and what not... fogettaboutit... your bomb done exploded already. Figuratively speaking of course.

Kansei Inai

In the midst of my writing deadline, I managed to squeeze out a 6-page script about a vampire. I'm not a fan of horror in general, and I really couldn't bring myself to pen a horror script. The best I could muster up was a noir action comedy about a Yakuza vampire who wants to escape a joyless life.

The current draft is available for review for a limited time on Trigger Street.

Punchlines

A quick travel tip: Don't visit Brazil during Feb-early March because that's the season when...

...natives don't wax.

Seasons of Conflict

Finally, I've come out of my little writing cave and have emerged triumphant with a solid draft of a novel I wrote during Nanowrimo last year.

For those interested in reading it, the manuscript is available on Trigger Street and an excerpt will be available on Amazon.com beginning February 25th.

Title: Seasons of Conflict

Genre: YA Adventure/Mythology

Logline: A young Titan god struggles to keep his family together after his mother dies at the hands of mercenaries during the Tiberian conflict.

Synopsis:

For sixteen-year-old Helios who couldn’t find his own magical powers in an empty jar, his once idyllic life as the son of Titan gods vanishes on the eve of his sister’s wedding: a renegade gnome flees from his clan to warn the Titans about the disappearance of the legendary elixir of life.

One day later, the wedding day turns into a bloodbath and his mother dies at the hand of mercenaries. While his domineering father obsesses over recovering the elixir of life, Helios must choose whether to dutifully obey his father’s wishes or avenge his mother’s death.

But when the mercenaries return to abduct his twin sister Selene, he rebels against his father and joins forces with mythical creatures as he travels across the treacherous lands of ancient Macedonia to rescue her. Eventually, his increasingly erratic father discovers his disappearance and punishes Helios for his duplicity.

Days pass. Weeks pass. Months pass and Selene, abandoned by her family, harnesses all of her fury to exact revenge on her father who refused to negotiate for her safe return. But when the moment for revenge materializes, her captor steals the opportunity from her. Selene’s insatiable rage propels her to hunt down her brother instead and virtually nothing can stop her as her physical and magical powers have grown stronger.

When Helios comes close to discovering the truth about the elixir of life and who is ultimately behind its disappearance, he is forced to test his fledgling magical skills battling Selene. Although both become mortally wounded, Helios dives at the chance to save the world rather than save his own life. The primordial gods reward his selfless act of compassion by joining in to avert the destruction of the world.

Let the bidding war begin!

Punchlines

I bought one of those alarm clocks that generates sea, wind and jungle sounds. Trouble is, when the damn thing went off at 6 am yesterday, I was dreaming and...

...forgot to turn off the feature: Roaring Jungle Cat.

ABNA

At a post-New Year's dinner party, someone asked me what were my New Year's resolutions this year. I sized up her question and replied, "At this point in my life, what is there left to improve upon?" I was kidding, of course, but to be honest, I was stumped so I made one up on the spot.

Since picking up writing in full force, I have realized the value of setting goals and challenging yourself. So my next challenge will be to see something that I've written published, be it a short story in a magazine or a novel (gasp) published, marketed and distributed in bookstores.

All this is to say, I've been busy and haven't posted a blog in quite some time. Currently, I'm deep in editing mode on Seasons of Conflict, the first draft of which I had written during the Nanowrimo contest in November, 2009. Well, I'm turning that puppy into a few competitions this year, the first of which is the Amazon.com Breakthrough Novel Award. Hopefully, they won't think it's a dog.

It's good to set goals, I think, even at this stage in my life.

Punchlines

Said the little lamb to the shepherd boy, "Do you see what I see?"

The shepherd boy replied, "Of course, I can see what you see. I'm a proud Welshman after all..."