Decline of friendship

What type of friend are you... Best friend? Casual friend? Friend with benefits? Internet friend? Spiritual friend? Imaginary friend? 

Friend is defined as "a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard" according to dictionary.com. I prefer Wikipedia's definition of friendship, "cooperative and supportive behavior between two or more people. The term connotes a relationship which involves mutual knowledge, esteem, and affection and respect along with a degree of rendering service to friends in times of need or crisis."

Moreover, I am intrigued by Aristotle's take on tiers of friendship. 

1. There are your 'business partners' who benefit financially from their friends. 
   
2. There are your 'drinking buddies' who are people you have fun with. 
   
3. People with whom you pursue virtue (moral excellence). 
   

As I think through my dinky list of friends through the years, I begin to filter them with this Artistotilian lens and am surprised to discover a vast majority fall under business partners. These are not long-lived friendships. These relationships are rather transitory and defined by certain phases of my life: grade school, middle school, high school, college, and each subsequent job. These relationships are necessary to do your job well (be it homework, team assignments, post-merger integration). Generally, these relationships are functional and genial, but short-lived. A smaller fraction would fall under drinking buddies, largely due to the fact that I didn't make time for anything besides work and career. I would attend the obligatory wedding, birthday party, July 4th BBQ, but there never seemed to be enough hours in the day to do much more than that. Far fewer would be those categorized under the third tier. These are friends who compel me to be a better person. Given this perspective, I'm not quite sure I like what's happening here. Clearly, there has not been enough emphasis spending time with drinking buddies, right? 

Additionally, I was disheartened to read the recent decline of friendships in the U.S. According to a 2006 study documented in the journal the American Sociological Review, Americans are thought to be suffering a loss in the quality and quantity of close friendships since at least 1985. The study states 25% of Americans have no close confidants, and the average total number of confidants per citizen has dropped from four to two. That's a shame. So looks like y'all need to get your rear in gear and spend time with your drinking buddies, too.

Punchlines

Which reminds me, have you met a nice girl already? When are you going to introduce us? You hungry? Eat. You should eat. You're looking so thin. And you being a Doctor... such a catch. Why do we never see your lady friends? Are you the gay?

It's not as if I'm discounting the possibility, but Bubbie, listen to me. I am not, repeat, NOT the gay!